I loved the topic Reproduction in Biology. Each time it was taught, I paid extra attention avoiding distractions as much as possible. Plz don’t start getting strange ideas, I’m a virgin. Laughs!
The idea of sperm fertilizing the egg wows me each time I think of it so, I want to talk about how this Reproduction happens with money.
You see, money is like sperm. Once it is poured on a fertile egg, (ideas, investment opportunity, intellectual development etc) it produces amazing results.
If you have money today and spend it frivolously, I’ll liken that to ejaculating on the floor while having intercourse. The seed is wasted. That could have been a Bill Gate you know.
When you earn money, you have three major choices. Spending, Saving, and Investing. If you want to grow wealth, you must know how to Increase your Income.
Saving and Investing rightly are the secret of perpetuating wealth.
Are you pouring your hard earned resources on empty ground or a fertile soil?
If you earn money and all you do is live large with no tangible investment and or savings, you’re wasting your sperm.
Now here are a few ways to get a bouncy baby with your money
1. Save your sperm
Did you know that each time a man ejaculates, it takes about 74 days to replenish
Each money you get has a cycle. Some days, weeks and months. It’s even more painful to see people who have monthly cycle of income spend without saving. Don’t waste your seed, you might need some to impregnate your ideas tomorrow.
For instance you have a job that pays you monthly, it means your money comes in a 30 days cycle. What most people do is to spend everything and wait for the next cycle to come. You can’t go far with this. You must save your sperm to fertilize the ready egg in it’s cycle.
Before I was born, people have been advised to save at least 10% of whatever they earn no matter how little it might be. When this money accumulates, you can then invest or ejaculate it into a fertile egg to give you a bouncy baby
2. Protect your sperm
Ask anyone looking for the fruit of the womb, they’ll tell you the amount of advice the get as to how to live. For instance, you must eat healthily because some food can reduce your chances of having a healthy sperm. I once read an article where the writer adviced men to eat lots of banana and do less of soda and carbonated drinks.
How does this relate to money growing? You have to grow the right mindset. Feed yourself with information and knowledge about how to manage your money like you’re doing right now.
When you take out time to get financial education, you protect your money from waste, preventful loss and depreciation. Learn all you can about how money truly works.
3. Aim and shoot your sperm on a fertile egg:
A man looking for a child must get involved in knowing when his wife is best ready. Some years ago, I used monitor my wife’s cycle more than she does.
You must get acquainted with how the cycle of opportunities run. Some of us aim but shoot our hard earn and protected sperm at the wrong season. Take it or leave it, not every business opportunity is for you.
You job is to be on the lookout for the right opportunities to invest. Read about the stock and money markets. Court financial analyst, bankers and brokers. These people always have first hand information that can save you trouble.
4. Nurse your Pregnancy; Keep Track of your Money
It’s not enough to get pregnant. You must nurse the pregnancy to carry it to term. Register for antenatal 😁.
Never leave your investment soley to third party or managers. Learn how the system works. Caring for your pregnant investment entails arming yourself with adequate information to protect it.
I remember when my wife was pregnant, I’ll wake in the middle of the night and help her position well. I’ll adjust her pillows, turn her the right side and go back to sleep. Never lose track of your investments. Look out for clues to know when to exit.
5. Wait for the Right time for birth:
There is time for everything. Now the time has come to give birth 😉. Some Investments mature in a short time, some longer however when the time comes, let you ROI be delivered safely.
Interestingly, you can chose to do normal delivery or CS. A CS in this case means not waiting too long for the virgina to dilate (full investment tenure). You can induce labor if the Investment is at stake or there’s an uncertainty about the carrier.
6. Grow your
new born Baby:
Can you send a new born baby an errand? If no why then do you eat your first fruit? A man once told me to only eat from the 3rd generation of my investment’ profits.
Now you have a beautiful baby ‘profit’ after 9 months or more of waiting. Instead of spending right away, put at least 60% back into the Investment. This is to allow your baby to grow more babies so your home will be full of babies.
Money loves those who manages it well. In such hands it dwells in peace and grows. Don’t let the joy of Parenthood excite you too much. You’ve not arrived. Your target should be the great grand children. Only then will you have succeeded greatly.
It is good to be a father but much better to be a great grand father. But if you force your newborn to run errands, you will kill her and your dreams of grandfathership is gone for good.
In conclusion, it may seem like I’m speaking in parables but here’s the truth. We can learn for all nature has given us and adapt it in any form or area of our lives we desire.
If I’m asked to summarize all I’ve said here, I’d say, save part of your income, invest in a fertile idea, monitor your investments and reinvest your ROI for 2 generations before attempting to eat from it. It’s called delayed gratification.
Till I come your way again, take charge of your finances and have #MoneyBliss.